A fair number of you may be getting your first ever Run Update eNewletter. How you’ve made it this long in life without this eclectic collection of insight is beyond me! These weekly emails are full of good running info, regional race reminders, tasteless jokes, life observations and multiple other hooey for which you’ll probably have no need. However, they are “free” and “you get what you pay for!” If you enjoy them, and over 10,700 do (or they just haven’t gotten around to unsubscribing), do nothing. Much like locust, they will continue to reappear at regular intervals. If you hate them, just unsubscribe. You WILL find some useful information among all the ranting and raving; however, you may have to be like Indiana Jones and dig thru a lot of cobwebs & decaying corpses to find it!
5) Former president Bill Clinton was at a baseball game to perform some activities for the home team. About 10 minutes before the game, a secret service guy whispered in his ear.Upon hearing what he had to say, Bill picked up Hillary by the ears and threw her mightily towards home plate!
The secret service guy ran up to Bill Clinton with a look of horror on his face and exclaimed:
"Sir, I believe you seriously misunderstood me!”
“I said that it was time to throw out the first Pitch!”
6) A lot of you have collected a lot of running knowledge over the years. If you’re interested in sharing it with our runners of tomorrow and live up north of the Lehigh Valley, Lehighton High School is looking for a new Cross Country coach.
Head Coach Cross Country Needed (Boys and Girls): Lehighton High School. Season runs from August to end of October and maybe longer if kids make PIAA States. Pay is $3225 and you will need criminal, child abuse, and FBI clearances. (I realize that this latter requirement will be an issue for many of you!). If interested, send a letter of application to:
Everyone I know that coaches XC says its one of the most fulfilling things they have ever done in their lives.
7) A young man took his date to an X-rated movie. They purchased refreshments and he showed his date to her seat.
Soon after the onscreen action started, things got hot and heavy. As they did, the young woman put her hand on the man's lap and started getting “busy”.
Smiling, she looked over at him and remarked;
"From what I can feel, it’s obvious that this is really getting you excited, too. But how come you feel so cold? Do you have bad circulation?” “No", he responded, “what I have now is your fingerprints all over my popsicle!"